A Day in the Mind of Chris Burzlaff

The new and improved daily adventures and incomprehensible ramblings of my life.

Friday, April 28, 2006

The Chicago Post

Alright. After several days of a work-in-progress post, I finally have something presentable from my trip to Chicago. It didn’t help that I had to change offices this week, but that is another story. For those who might not recall, I had to leave for Chicago the day after my birthday to attend a reliability conference for a week. All in all, I enjoyed myself, although the non-conference activities clearly outweigh the conference sessions themselves. But let’s start from the beginning.

To start the trip off, I was on stand-by for both my connections to Chicago and literally got the last seat on the plane on one of them. Don’t ask why because I don’t know the reason, but I did make it there and was pleasantly surprised that my luggage also made it! I wasn’t at the same hotel as everybody else (since I was informed about making my own travel plans too late) so I had the luxury/curse of being removed from everyone else. Unfortunately, for me this meant that I had to ride in a lot of taxis, which I wouldn’t mind as much if it weren’t for all the money/time spent hailing a cab (although I did meet some nice cabbies).

For dinner that first night our whole group got together and had dinner at a steakhouse with Gene, our CEO. As we sit, he announces to the table he’s ordering wine and looks for other takers. After several people say they’ll have some beer, I look at Gene and tell him that I’ll have some wine with him. So he ended up ordering 2 bottles for 3.5 people to drink, and by the end of the evening I had had about 3/4 of a bottle myself. He’s a real down to earth guy who remembered my name and we joked about my turning 23 and just being so young. I thought surely some of these other company reliability big-shots would have dined with Gene before, but apparently it’s a very rare occurrence. So it was rather amusing to be rubbing elbows at dinner with our CEO after 10 months with the company versus 10+ years of everybody else.

I must clarify a point about our location. Both the hotels and conference were in Rosemont about 15 miles outside of Chicago. That’s why on the second night, we decided to check out the city and experience a little more traditional Chicago. Several of our group presented at the conference that day and they were looking to celebrate a job well done. So we took the train in (which took about an hour, but was faster than the traffic) and went in search of some deep-dish pizza. After walking down several blocks, following my supervisor with the map (it seemed like a recipe for disaster), we arrived at the original Uno’s. There was an hour wait so we put our order in and sat outside where we drank pitchers of beer and guys could smoke some cigars. For some reason they ordered a lot of pizza and each one was an inch thick so hunger wasn’t an issue. I got through 2.5 slices and drank about 3/4 of a pitcher of beer before calling it quits and heading home. There’s just something amusing about drinking with these company big-shots.

Well the next morning I was a little late getting to the conference (stupid taxis) and didn’t see anyone from our group until after the first session. When they saw me, they asked if I was feeling alright and if last night had any effect on me. Apparently, my supervisor had a little too much pizza and beer and was the only one who got sick that night. I find that rather comical (something to lord over him perhaps?), but it killed any adventurous plans for the rest of the trip, leaving me to fend for myself the last few nights.

The conference itself was rather dull and surprisingly uninformative. I really am shocked at just how much I know about reliability stuff than most of the groups there, but it goes to show what a highly reliable company looks like compared to one just trying to implement one. I was also a rather small conference as well, about 250 people, but it still drew groups from Venezuela to Canada. I can’t complain too much because they gave us good meals, ice-cream breaks and a mixer one night where we each got 2 drink tickets redeemable for boxed wine or Bud Light. It’s not very classy, but at least it’s free.

It was a fun trip, but it felt like I was missing the adventure buddy that I’ve depended upon in some past trips (Rach in London, Becca in Japan, etc). So I would like to revisit Chicago some other time and actually get to spend some time in the city, but I did have fun and I can’t knock all the great moments that I had during the trip. And hey, I’ve got new drinking buddies in my superiors!

Saturday, April 22, 2006

It's Here And Working!

I'm back from Chicago and my birthday weekend. Tomorrow I'll post about the past events, but I do at least want to brag that I am posting this for the very first time from my home computer via high-speed internet.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Post Secret Post

In honor of another weblog, Post Secret, I have a secret I wish to share….



I’ll be gone for the next 10-days as I celebrate my birthday and fly to Chicago, so everyone have a great holiday and I’ll see you when I get back!

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

End Of An Era

In 1927, the silent era ended with the debut of the first talking motion picture “The Jazz Singer”. In 1992, the fall of the Berlin Wall symbolized the decline of the Soviet Union and the end of the Cold War. In 2006, the end of the dial-up era was marked by the Burzlaff’s purchasing high-speed internet.

For those who know my father, this is quite a big and momentous step for him to be taking since it is has never been a necessity to have anything faster then dial-up. Years of complaining and comparisons proved fruitless. All we ever got out of it was an internet accelerator, which did make things a bit more manageable. I’d like to say that we wore him out in the end, but to be honest I don’t know what caused this momentous event to happen. And frankly, I don’t want to know, because what’s really important is that we’ll soon have something that doesn’t evoke serious aggravation and aggression.

Of course this doesn’t necessarily mean that I will be online or around the internet all the time at home. I’m on the computer enough as it is during the day and since it’s a family computer I can’t leave something like AIM running all the time with the expectation to chat whenever I choose. Those moments will have to wait until I eventually move out (which for you doubters out there will occur; it’s just a matter of when). But I should be around more often to slowly introduce myself back into a social internet environment.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Ask Mr. Burzlaff

I’m thinking about starting a weekly Q&A session for this website. Here’s a troubled reader who requests some insight.

Dear Chrisforaday,
I thought you were swamped at work and had to get stuff done? All I hear about is how you can finally ease up since people are gone. How does that work? I need to get out of the produce business.
Sincerely,

Girthy in Bakersfield

Well Girthy, there’s a simple mathematical formula to explain how work actually gets done in my industry:

Where:
T = Total time available (held constant)
w = Available work time
n = The number of people present
c = Number of pots of coffee made
b = Average bladder capacity of n people per c pots made
x = Average consumed liquid associated with bladder b
Ga = Actual budget spent
Gp = Projected budget
j = Number of projects
k = Costs associated with projects
u = Urgency of projects
M = Conversion factor into meetings held
R = Personal time spent
Φ = random probability factor dependant upon seasonal, presentational and mandatory training factors.

As you can see, people provide that x-factor in my daily routine. What's shown aside from work time, w, and personal time, R, is the impact people have on meetings. As the number of people decrease, meeting time decreases and as a result more time can be distributed to work time and relaxation time. You will also notice that the actual business aspect of it all enters the equation, but is rated minimally compared to the impact that people have since meetings cannot occur without personnel. If meeting time is reduced to a minimum and work time is held constant, my personal time increases, thus I can do the same amount of work in a day without meetings as a day with meetings and feel more at ease with the increase of personal time. See how simple it is! I hope this clears it up for you Girthy, and keep those questions coming!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Links

In honor of one of my favorite websites, Gamegoof.com, I will share some various internet site links that I've collected over the past several weeks (most of which I got from that site).

1. Tragic Domain Names

2. 1001 Things to do with Liquid Nitrogen

3. Boy Caught in Claw Machine

4. CMDs: Camels of Mass Destuction

5. 50,000 Word Story Written Without the Letter ‘E’

6. The University Quiz

7. Graffiti-Bot

8. Beat Super Mario Bros. in 6-minutes?

I'm off tomorrow so have a great weekend!

Monday, April 03, 2006

A Calling?


Is it a coincidence that my birthday happens to be on Easter this year?

 

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